It was similar to the sort of cookies his grandmother baked, Ethan suddenly recalled as he took a bit of the treat. The tiny memory triggered a couple more, including a reminder that his grandmother wasn't really his grandmother. Still, he couldn't quite find a visual of the woman, either way. He just had a warm feeling now, when he thought about her.

His mother though, as much as he'd tried, he couldn't remember her. His cohesive memories began with the angel he'd seen, before he'd found himself with Minewin, before everything had changed.

"You like it?" Minewin asked, jarring Ethan from his thoughts.

Ethan nodded, chewing quickly so he could respond verbally.

"It made me remember something."

"I wish you could remember more, young one," Minewin said, reaching to brush back some of Ethan's hair. Ethan shivered slightly, leaning into Minewin's touch. He couldn't quite figure out why he was so drawn to Minewin, but he wanted to spend every second he could with the man.

For all the nights they'd shared a bed, it had been only sleep and sometimes a bit of comfort. Ethan was sure he was old enough to not get so scared and sad at night, but something nagged at him. He wondered if somehow he subconsciously missed the mother he couldn't seem to remember.

But Minewin would never be his lover. Ethan knew that. Minewin had the Spectir to share his bed in that sense. He'd seen them couple, which seemed strange to Ethan. Not that he'd caught them, but that Minewin could become so engrossed in a sex act with something that... wasn't human. As far as Ethan could gather, Spectirs weren't human. They weren't entirely free-thinking, though they weren't slaves.

Ethan wondered if it was actually Sine's choice to be Minewin's lover. And when he wondered that, he always found himself wondering what the same act would be like if he was involved in it, with Sine taking him.

It was pleasant, but not as fulfilling as the thought of...

"What dreams do you dream during the day?" Minewin asked, leaning so very close to Ethan that Ethan could feel Minewin's warm breath.

"Just thinking," Ethan replied before taking another bite of the cookie.

"About what?"

Ethan held up a finger, signalling he needed a minute to chew before he could answer.

"There is something special about you," Minewin continued, not looking at Ethan directly. "I wish I could figure out what it was."

"Do you love Sine?" Ethan spat out so quickly that he couldn't believe he'd actually said it.

Minewin looked shocked, or as shocked as the normally calm general could look.

"Why do you ask that?" Minewin inquired. "Sine is with me for life, so it is better to love him than detest him."

"You..."

"Sine does not steal from the shadow of my lost love, nor does he take away from the future of possible new love, though that is something I never thought of as possible, until now."

Minewin reached out to cup Ethan's chin, catching Ethan's eyes with his own.

Perhaps, Ethan realized, he was wrong about so many things.